Well…the Olympics have come and gone and so has the original purpose of my blog. I have two options: 1) Wait an agonizing 18 months until the winter olympics occur in 2014 or 2) Continue to write and have fun along the way. And considering my love for all things .gifs, puns and blogs, I think option 2 is the best fit, don’t you think? So sit back, relax and let me tell you a little bit about my life.
The first (and most important news) is that I GOT A NEW JOB! Ahhhhhhhh! It’s like every day is Oprah’s Favorite things day for me. I honestly haven’t been this happy in YEARS. Who knew a simple career change could make such a drastic difference in my life? I feel like I’m Katniss from The Hunger Games. Every morning I wake up for work and I want to scream “I VOLUNTEER! I VOLUNTEER AS TRIBUTE FOR WORK TODAY!”
I suppose at this point I should tell you a little more of the background story so you don’t think I’m a complete nutjob. Long story short, after Uni (that’s what the Brits call college, I KNOW THIS BECAUSE MY OLYMPIC POSTS ATTRACTED READERS IN EUROPE AND I FELT REAL COOL) I ended up wasting 4 years of my life in retail management and it was just the poops. That’s not to take away from the awesome people I met along the way, but it is one of the most selfless jobs I’ve ever had. Day in, day out, people walk all over you, destroy the store and have no consideration or care for all the hard work you do. You’re nothing more than a face to make money for the corporation. Honestly, everyone should have to work a customer-service based job at least once in their lives. It teaches you a lot about compassion, humility and empathy towards others. Needless to say, I was beyond miserable.
^Re-enactment of me going to work every day before the intervention
Just when I thought I was at my breaking point and that I’d never find a way out, one of my bff’s (whom I’m extremely grateful for) finally snapped some sense into me and had me apply for a job that I never thought I’d be qualified for (let alone find interesting). Thankfully I took their advice and had an interview set up 3 VERY short days later.
Trying to prepare for an interview in 3 days is not something I enjoyed if I am being quite honest. First off, I needed a new suit. I had one from my college days but not only was it ugly, I couldn’t get the pants to fit. That’s right, I had gotten too big to fit into my stubborn “slim fit” pants. I felt like I was in my own personalized Yoplait yogurt commercial from hell – the one where I’ve thrown myself on my bed trying to pull my pants on to no avail while that damn Yellow Polka dot bikini song plays in the background. I tell myself it’s because I accidentally threw the dry-clean only pants in the dryer one time but I felt like Regina George from Mean Girls. Sorry, we only carry sizes 1, 3, 5, you could try Sears. Too many Kalteen bars </3
Thankfully I was able to find an acceptable Calvin Klein replacement on sale and I spent the rest of the time obsessing and over-analyzing every detail of the upcoming interview. Before I knew it the day of the interview arrived and it was go time. And you know what? The interview went awesome. It went on for about an hour and 20 minutes and the entire time it was conversational. It just felt right. Walking out, I knew I had given it my all and that whatever happened was now out of my hands. Four agonizing days passed by before i heard my fate. I knew that there were handfuls of other people who interviewed for the same position so I didn’t want to get my hopes up……BUT then they called and offered me the job! 😀
After running around like a banshee screeching sentiments of excitement, I called my mom who was equally ecstatic and extremely happy for me. Then I called my dad. Things were … how do I put this nicely…slightly more mundane with good ol’ pops. While he too was happy for me, he also told me not to get too excited because I still needed to pass a background check. THANKS DAD. Talk about a Debbie downer. But of course, I passed it with flying colors.
All I had left to do was get fingerprinted for the new job (you’ll find out why later, it’s a standard security measure when you work with $$) and fill out my new-hire paperwork. You’d think it’d be easy but of course nothing with me ever is. I went to go get my prints done and all I had to was put my darn hand on a thermal imaging machine. For the prints to be “readable,” you had to score a 14 or higher on the machine. I don’t know what 14 means, all I know is that is the minimum # you need. So I put my hand up and what happens? I score an 8. AN EIGHT. The lady was like “Well…that’s not right. Let’s try again!” Same thing. Another 8. Then an 9. Then an 8 again. At this point I start to freak out. Anyone who knows me knows my hands get clammy and gross when I get nervous and I instantly begin to psych myself out. What happens next is even worse. I SCORED a SIX. A SIX.
Her response? “In all my years, I’ve NEVER seen a reading that low.” COOL. GREAT. AWESOME. Here I am thinking I’m going to lose this job before I even start it because my palms are too damn sweaty. The highest I ever achieved on that stupid machine was an 11. So what did I have to do as an alternative? TAKE INK HANDPRINTS THE OLD SCHOOL WAY.
I still want to bury my head in SHAME when I think about that awful moment. But it’s over, I got what I needed done and I was able to move on. Needless to say, I ran away as quickly as possible when it was over.
That little moment of delight aside, everything else has been just fantastic 🙂 Flash forward 1 month later and I’m happily employed in the…..(drumroll please) FINANCIAL INDUSTRY. That’s right, me, of all people, works in the banking and finance industry. WHO WOULD HAVE THOUGHT. Clearly I’m putting that journalism education to use!
I still find it hard to believe but I work for an awesome organization (U.S. Bancorp) and work with an equally awesome group of people. I work on the corporate side so I get a cushy little cubicle in an awesome Downtown office, 8-4:30 monday-fri hours and best of all….EVERY NIGHT, WEEKEND AND HOLIDAY OFF! I’m not sure if it’s still the “honeymoon” phase but I really do love going to work every single morning. I’m learning so many new and exciting things and most importantly, I’m happy 🙂
So there you have it. I know this post is kinda self-serving but it’s a big change in my life and lot of people have been asking what I’ve been up to. If you’ve made it this far, thanks for following along. I hope to write about the fun adventures that come along in the future…or at least until 2014 when my beloved Olympics return to us once again 😉
k, I’ll finally stop blabbing on now 🙂